Why to control your Emotions?

Why does it happen that someday out of our lives, we are bestowed to live in a dream world, when everything seems to be just perfect !!!

Why does it happen that someday out of our lives, nothing seems to be in place, everything becomes a mishap, infact, it is not exactly a mishap in itself, it SEEMS to be one of them rather.

When smiles persist 24×7 and eyes shine with luminous intensity.

When even slight catalysts of something mistakenly said or accidentally related or remembered from past or some girl or some girl-friend causes whole day being thrown into a frustrated dustbin.

When your feet and mind run quick, you think fast, analyse faster and decide fastest on everything that comes under your way.

When you wanna cry hard, but you find a shoulder only when your tears have dried up.

When everyone seems a friend. And when you solve anyone’s headaches on tips of your fingers and your own headaches seem vanished for centuries.

When you are unable to find anyone to talk to in this harsh world.

When you spend continuous hours sitting on your chair, staring blank at your laptop, doing nothing.

 

Emotions rule us. They dominate us. In fact, they cause delay and come in way between our persistent problems and their quick fix solutions.

We succumble to the influence of others on us. We surrender to our own mood swings and accept defeat from ‘influencing’ outside agents of the world.

[We start disliking a movie just because the person sitting next to us is criticising it too much.

OR

You start loving a girl (with whom you never talked, just bumped into her ridiculously some unlucky day) once your friends tease you with her name for several months !!! ]

People say – let off your emotions. It keeps you balanced, devoid of frustrations and cheerful in life. Such a hypocrisy !!! Over-cheerfulness for a long time period has often invited me troubles. And gloomy gloomy sad atmosphere drags me with itself to nowhere.

Its just that for some last couple of weeks, I am driven into this weird world of emotions and feelings. Year 2010 has been, apart from a few big incidences, for me, devoid of all emotions and fairy tale fantasies. But nowadays, may be it’s the incoming monsoon or the second half of the year beginning itself, I get perturbed easily, get happy on little things, become annoyed on everything odd I face and often find myself blank – Where to go from here onwards!!! I feel lazy when I shouldn’t and work frivolously where not required. Something is lost.

Something is missing.

These sudden mood changes are making me week once again, they have returned, I had left them far behind months ago. Then why have they begun to distract me once again.

I find myself at certain conclusions with certain opinions, but most of the time, I am left with blankness …

directionless …..

confused and not happy with whatever way presently days are passing on.

Don’t know whether Not TO or Not TO control these emotions.

Coz if I don’t, then what. And if I do, then how!

Snehil Basoya

 

Double-Bed in a Single Room : IITD

PART-ONE : The Introduction

Girls in Himadri and Kailash Hostels are given rooms of the size of Football Grounds. They utilise it by demanding more and more Teddy Bears from their boyfriends and adore their rooms with lots of them, I discovered on their House Days. Sometimes, they even compete with their roomies on the quantity of teddy bears, I discovered in one of the rooms. On one hand, IIT fraternity constructs a 9-Storey Hostel for these Teddy Bears and not too far away, on the other side of the campus, boys are left with sleepless nights with their hubbies on their Double Beds, preparing them for their better future.

A typical boy’s hostel Single Room opens with the door without a door lock. (They have been broken several times with hammers as one of the roomies often looses the key). (This is the Naked Truth – a Single Room has ROOMIES) Some doors also have peep holes, they are not holes in fact. Ranging from 1.5 cm to 15 cm, they are formed due to peeling off of wood due to mis-placements of hammers when thrown with force.

As soon as you push the door, you expect it to open. Unfortunately it doesn’t. Rather, it hits hard within a range of 1 feet to the Double Bed. You enter through a tunnel-sort of narrow opening and find yourself stepped over a miserable collection of clothes and chappals (Chappals are borrowed, rather stolen, from some far-away room). This miserable collection on the floor measures somewhere around “3 ft X 2 ft” in area. Rest of the space is occupied by, once again, the Double Bed. Of course there is a table, but you can’t study on it. If you do so, you don’t have space to keep your clean clothes, books, waste material, water bottle, project files, laptop, used up unwashed under wears, towels, polythenes, paper bags, medicines, soap case, Lord Ganesha and other memorable and necessary things (There is 1 almirah for books and 1 for all other items, they too are shared).

When you sleep, you transfer all garbage to the table. When you have to make a file, you transfer the same garbage back to the bed. Owing to acute shortage of space, you are forced to keep your laptop on your lap. And prolonged exposure of laptop to the lap can cause impotency.

IIT-D fraternity is intelligent. They force roomies to sleep on a Double Bed and simultaneously, create a constant fear of impotency as well ..!!

PART-TWO : The Night Chat

[This Chat is inspired from Aravali Hostel. This is Fact mixed with Fiction. Fictional names and attributes have been given to the two characters.]

Its 2 O’ clock at night.

DHADAM ..!! A loud attack on the miserable door.

Rahul: (Sleeping like hell) Kaun ????????

Aditya: Tera Baap. Khol ******.

Rahul: Aa raha hun.

And he opens the door with closed eyes. Aditya’s fingers search for the switch board.

Rahul: Light mat On kario ……. (and he falls on the bed again like a dead corpse)

Aditya: K …. Fine.

He drops his bag on the other part of the bed which is already filled with garbage transferred by Rahul. Changes clothes in the dark, throws the garbage on the floor and falls on the bed too.

Awkward silence for 5 minutes.

“Today was a hectic day yaar”, Aditya broke the silence.

“Why? Don’t say you spoke to her”, intrigued the dead corpse.

“I spoke or not, how does it make my day hectic?”

Rahul takes a quick turn with a cunning smile on his face, faces Aditya closely and says, “Tell me what happened today !!”

“Nothing ********, just same as other routine days,” sighs Aditya, lost in his own thoughts, facing towards the roof.

“Bata na ********, mujhse chhupayega,” comes another smile.

Aditya continues his silence.

Rahul tries again, “ See, if you don’t wanna tell, just fuck of and let me sleep.” He turns again and pretends to doze off.

5 minute silence.

“I said a ‘Hi’,” said Aditya finally.

Rahul turns slowly. “It was you or was it she?”

“It was me only.”

“So …… when did this tragic incident happen?” Rahul looked very curious.

“CYP lab.”

“hmmm … I could see those chemicals jumping out of the burrette,” he was enjoying it.

Aditya didn’t reply.

“Kya hua  ***  **  *****? Senti ho gaya kya? Fir se nahi yaar, we are discussing on it from last 2 weeks daily at this topic daily at this same time. Every night you force me to open the door at midnight, never come on time, and then fuck off my sleeping hours in these rubbish discussions, boys and girls, realities of life, spirituality, friendships, trust and belief and blah blah blah …”

“Do you think she will ever talk to me?”

“However, I love these discussions … !!”

“Tell me your view point first.”

“Who … Aakriti?”

“Haan ********.”

“Why not, I told you in last night’s midnight lecture too, if ego doesn’t come in between, then there is no problem in maintaining a formal Hi-Hello.”

“It isn’t at all about the ego yaar, you know it very well ……..”

“But I am unable to understand why you bother so much about her. Has she ever shown a sign of love, or leave it, any sign of respect towards you?”

“No, but …”

“What but, listen to me. She is NOT your girlfriend, and if some tom-dick-n-harry owns her, then she didn’t deserve you, that’s it ..!!! She doesn’t deserve those who care for her, but yes, jitna main tujhe jaanta hun, you don’t deserve those who don’t deserve you.”

“You always give nice fande yaar !! Anyways, leave it. Teri waali ka kya hua? Jiya was looking really HOT today !! Sulphuric Acid to wo bhi bahot uchhal rahi thi teri taraf :P”

“You already know yaar, I am no more infatuated, she simply sat beside me today and as soon as ……..”

**** ** ****, *** ** *****, **********, JUST SHUT UP YOUR MOUTHS AND LET ME SLEEP”, came a voice from the opposite room from a 3rd person [LASSU]

“Lassu is shouting yaar, we shall continue tomorrow.”

“Fine no problem, but it will be better if you return by 1 O’ clock.”

“Why, you wanna sleep more?”

“No, so that we discuss in detail :D. Good Night.”

“Good Night !!”

……………….. and the Double Bed signs off for tonight.

[This blog was written in profound demand by some people as a result of some rigorous discussion on “late-night chats on Double Beds” on the dinner mess table at Karakoram. Comments requested.]

Snehil Basoya

 

Romance and Mysticism

 

When was the last time your ego went out for a death? Or you simply put aside your lure and materialism in the dustbin and taste some new virtues of Work, Energy and Power? Or when was the last time when you sent your eyes in the deepest of the blues far above and they never returned back?

Romance takes away your sleep, your easiness, your convenience at everything and what not. Conventions are so easily made, isn’t it! Romance does make you a victim of unfairness of life once you choose to give everything to a girl, but then very few people reach the next level – The Mysticism.

Waltz holds a special place, fantasies provide an ultimate time utilization in love, but suppose fantasies knock your door every time you wish them to be true! When Love faces ups and downs, and the relationship becomes experienced enough having been a witness to so many phases of hatred and misunderstandings, once the relation sustains, it reaches a new level called Romance. And when romance persists, it becomes a short –timed phase called Mysticism.

When you are a lover and you are in mysticism, you don’t get perturbed by small bullshit happenings of the world; how do they matter to you after all. You may listen to enormous noises, but you only hear the voice of your own thoughts, every time, every moment. You no more live in the world created for you to live in, you start living in a world which you have created for your own. When you work, you give your 100%, when you speak, you speak perfect. Your eyes are so deep and innocent that the person talking to you is easily mesmerised. Your prefer remaining quiet most of the time, but your wavelengths are so defined that your personality is strongest ever. You carry a smile 24X7 on your radiating face. You solve your problems yourself. A sphere of unknown power is created around you as you walk. You love yourself, you love everyone.

You reach the what-they-say, divine. You reach those places in this world where a common fellow of yours can never reach in his ideology. Your thoughts are your God. And you are the God of your own thoughts.

………………. And surprisingly, you still love the girl !!!

Snehil Basoya.

 

Raajneeti – Politics and Beyond ………

Raajneeti – Politics and Beyond

If I thought I was born just to weep out myself miserably in romantic films, I was wrong.

If I thought Gulaal the was the only hot and wild movie which could produce sweat inside 20 degree temp Select City Walk, I was wrong.

And if I thought that the year 2010 will continue reeling with tasteless popcorns, I was wrong yet again.

Raajneeti produced yet another hangover on me (I am usually prone to “influenced” hangovers, Geed is well aware!). Firstly the very concept –

People say that Politics is “unethical” – a bunch of blind and unhuman humans who are ready to stoop down to unimagined depths of immorality to carve out certain materialistic persuits. Politics is nothing but a manifestation of a person’s ego and inability to accept material defeat, his lure for irresistible power, has no place for emotions and feelings, is constantly aimed at destroying the opposition in ANY possible way for EVER.

But hold on, what if we say that Politics has “Ethics” of its own. No one has defined Ethics in a single definite way. The bunch is not blind, it is rather crazy and mad. It is not unhuman, humans are always evil and vile. If it is an outcome of ego, then who doesn’t fall prey to it in this world..!! Defeat is never acceptable and power is something which every person wishes if it could be theirs. Politics definitely holds place for emotions and feelings, coz it is just because of their immense and deep to heart feelings for some close ones, that some people are ready to fight out their lives in politics against the world. And if someone says, “Thok do saale ko”, then whats wrong? The other person is thinking the same way too. In fact, it is just one of the infinite ways of living an adventurous and eventful life ..!!

The definitions of right and wrong are different for different people. What may be wrong for someone or even the society may be right for someone else who may eventually bring more satisfaction and revolutions in the society. It is true, definitely true that positions, posts and material gains do not matter that much in life in long terms as your spiritual satisfaction with your life and happiness. But it is just a matter of choice ..!! If you choose to choose the material way of living, then it is absolutely fine to live a new way of life – full of envy, ruthless hours, timeless sweat, excessive brain storming and what not ..!! It is just an interesting way of living life, with no defined constitution of right and wrong and an ultimate sole aim for a unique phase of life – Power.

Governance is not the same as politics. Politics has got a major role in determining the governance instead.

Politics is justified in its place, it just bring out the “shaitan” within a person. There is nothing wrong in it I suppose, it is just a game.

Prakash Jha produces a mesmerising movie. The Script was unmatchable with any of the recent Hindi movies. Direction was brainy and intelligent. There were however lot of abrupt discontinuities in background score. Even the songs weren’t picturized well, though the movie inherits awesomely soothing songs. Whatever, some acclaurades for the actors –

Manoj Bajpeyi – Return of the Jaffar ..!! His cunning and mesmeric eyes, his dramatically strong voice intonations, his plight whenever fear caught hold of him and his portrayal of a character which presumes himself to be strong enough, but seeks for dependency every each and other time, Hats Off ..!!

Arjun Rampal – His personality stands out, among the big guns of Bollywood this time. He has done it before and he has done it again – reaching at par with the other superstars in the same movie. His act of a hungry beast, a strong voice-laden leader and a shy lover commands nothing less than Hats Off ..!!

Katrina Kaif – She is getting beautiful day after day, this time, brings a mature, womanly attire. Has perhaps outperformed her hitherto best performance in New York. Romance doesn’t sizzle, but yes, she makes you emotional in a few scenes. The Saari cameo towards the climax brings applause.

Ajay Devgan – Starts with a thunder, seems as if he will carry the whole movie on his own shoulders. As the movie moves on, there is not much left for him. However, he transforms greatly from a confident, gallant Dalit leader to a peaceful, exhausted audience of the game. Acts to his name.

Ranbir Kapoor – The Rule Maker, not exactly, but someone who has changed the rules, someone with those hidden masterplans, the wicked “harami” tactics, proving every of his master-stroke successful. Ranbir Kapoor has surely come out of his age. His face behind his mysterious expressionless mask. His acting deserves 10/10. He has entered thus into the big league of superheroes with Raajneeti.

Nana Patekar – 10 out of 10 prove less this time. The biggest pick. The Omnipotent observer. The silent protector. The wise guardian. The calm undefeatable warrior. His smile which contains the universe. His style which conveys to the audience – “I am here now, everything will be fine.” The Lord Krishna replication, Nana rocks.

There were a few mishaps in the movie too. The Kunti-Karna scene was truly a mistake. The Nasiruddin twist was difficult to digest. But keeping them aside, movie Raajneeti proves that 2010 is not yet dead.

Go for it ..!!!

Snehil Basoya